Sunday, March 23rd, 2008 at 8:00 PM
5 years ago
Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence 29th Anniversary Celebration with The Ex-Boyfriends, The B-Cups, and The Charm School Dropouts
NOIR: The Sisters' 29th Anniversary Celebration
Down a dark alley at the intersection of 29th and Anniversary lies a joint of ill repute. This is a den of sin, where the only thing deadlier than a gun is the dame holding it. The joint is called NOIR, and it flows with the dough and screams with the swingin' sounds of San Francisco's finest performers. It's a little place run by that brothel better known as The Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence. And honey, no one will treat your frame better than us.
NOIR is located in Dolores Park, making it the world's only outdoor speakeasy; what's the point of sin if you can't share it with your neighbor? Grab that pretty filly or stallion of yours and hoof it down to NOIR. There you can pull yourself up a patch of grass and lay out your own spread as Sister Dionna Cross plays a leading role in the Sisters' Grant Show [1:50p]. We've got no dirty laundry here kiddo; the green given to The Sisters gets back to the community, and over $25k will be going out at NOIR. So empty those pockets, 'cause no one can swing when weighed down with too much change.
And speaking of swingin', do we have a show for you! It all starts at noon. We've got the sultry sounds of The B-Cups to get the fire in your heart burning [12:30]. The Ex-Boyfriends step up to the mike and lay down songs that will put the sway in your swing [1:30p]. Then we crank up the furnace with SFBoylesque: those beautiful boys put the sin in scintillation [2:00p]. We round out our groove with Charm School Dropouts, a group that will knock you through the roof, and drown out the sirens of the fuzz [2:30p].
But we ain't quitin' yet! Oh no. We'll implicate you in our dirty deeds with our infamous contests. Break out your Sunday finest for our Bonnet Contest, and be judged by your peers and Sister Dana Van Iquity and Sister Roma [1:00p]! Or if you really want a pair of cement shoes "downstairs", line up to be our next Hunky Jesus [3:20]. Be warned though -- Sister Barbi Mitzvah and Sister Edith Myflesh are tough as nails (although the word on the street is that they might be bribable). Each contestant has an opportunity to add $100 to their bank! Not bad for exhibiting the sins of pride and vanity with a little envy thrown in for good measure. Now if all this talk of sin is getting you down, Sister Mable Syrup will be on hand to take Confessions. If this broad don't put you on the narrows, no one will. And yet, there are some mighty fine people in this city, and Sister Dinah Might will bestow the honor of Saint to those that serve our community [12:20p].
Now of course we didn't forget about your kids. Startin' at 10:30 am Sister Risqué brings the pastels, the eggs and the bunny for Children's Easter. There will be face painting, an egg hunt, and various activities - including a special reading by Sister Reyna Terror. Now we love our families, and all they encompass, but the management would like to advise those parents out there that once the music starts at noon, the tone can get sticky for impressionable minds. Parental discretion is advised.
NOIR is a Perpetual Indulgence™ Production.